boss: I’ve been reviewing the security footage from last night and… me: OH SHIT! boss: OH SHIT IS RIGHT! YOUR DANCE MOVES ARE ON POINT!
What did the left butt cheek say to the right one? If we stick together, we can stop this shit.
What did the left butt cheek say to the right one? If we stick together, we can stop this shit.
what did the cookie say to the supermodel? I promise not to crumb in your mouth.
what did the cookie say to the supermodel? I promise not to crumb in your mouth.
imagine if your fridge did what you do everyday,every half hour goes to your room opens the door and stares at you for 5minutes then leaves
imagine if your fridge did what you do everyday,every half hour goes to your room opens the door and stares at you for 5minutes then leaves
[NO SPOILERS] Did you hear about the stormtrooper who fell asleep at The Force Awakens? He missed everything!
[NO SPOILERS] Did you hear about the stormtrooper who fell asleep at The Force Awakens? He missed everything!
All the kings horses and all the kings men probably feel like they’re being grossly underutilized with that whole egg thing.
All the kings horses and all the kings men probably feel like they’re being grossly underutilized with that whole egg thing.
If your ringtone is my alarm sound, you can go straight to hell
If your ringtone is my alarm sound, you can go straight to hell
I hear Donald Trump wants every welfare recipient to take a drug test… I don’t even what to know what he’s planning to do with all those urine samples.
I hear Donald Trump wants every welfare recipient to take a drug test… I don’t even what to know what he’s planning to do with all those urine samples.
Why was the Scandinavian atheist warm? He had Thor doubt.
Why was the Scandinavian atheist warm? He had Thor doubt.
I’m not homophobic, I love my house!
I’m not homophobic, I love my house!