I’m not letting anyone into my head until I’ve cleaned up the place.
I tried to propose to my girlfriend from Thailand today but it went wrong. As soon as i got down on one knee she started undoing her skirt
I tried to propose to my girlfriend from Thailand today but it went wrong. As soon as i got down on one knee she started undoing her skirt
A Shout Out to all the beautiful women who don’t need to dress half naked to get a man’s attention. Stay classy! The rest of you, come with me.
A Shout Out to all the beautiful women who don’t need to dress half naked to get a man’s attention. Stay classy! The rest of you, come with me.
Oral contraceptive I recently had an experience with oral contraceptives. I asked a woman if she would like have sex with me. She said, “No”.
Oral contraceptive I recently had an experience with oral contraceptives. I asked a woman if she would like have sex with me. She said, “No”.
My 8-year-old just offered me leftover cashews from his lunch, asking “Do you want these nuts?” and I’m not mature enough to be a parent.
My 8-year-old just offered me leftover cashews from his lunch, asking “Do you want these nuts?” and I’m not mature enough to be a parent.
How is a gynecologist like a pizza delivery boy? They both get close enough to smell it, but if they eat it, they’ll be fired.
How is a gynecologist like a pizza delivery boy? They both get close enough to smell it, but if they eat it, they’ll be fired.
What do you call immigrants to Sweden? Ugly.
What do you call immigrants to Sweden? Ugly.
*Robocop smashes tail light* Uh oh, that’s a citation *He drops a bag of weed* Damn that’s 20 years *Robohippie starts to sweat*
*Robocop smashes tail light* Uh oh, that’s a citation *He drops a bag of weed* Damn that’s 20 years *Robohippie starts to sweat*
When I see someone in public talking on a bluetooth..I like to position myself on the other side, lean in & whisper “It’s ok I see them too”
When I see someone in public talking on a bluetooth..I like to position myself on the other side, lean in & whisper “It’s ok I see them too”
Have you ever accidentally ended a business call with “I love you?” Oh yeah me neither.
Have you ever accidentally ended a business call with “I love you?” Oh yeah me neither.