What do you call a proton with big hair? A ‘froton.
If science is so great why hasn’t it invented chocolate that has negative calories?
If science is so great why hasn’t it invented chocolate that has negative calories?
How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? fish.
How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? fish.
Me: “I want to go on a diet.” Food: “LOL no.”
Me: “I want to go on a diet.” Food: “LOL no.”
So I checked into a low class hotel I called the frontdesk and told him “I got a leak in my sink,” he said “go ahead.”
So I checked into a low class hotel I called the frontdesk and told him “I got a leak in my sink,” he said “go ahead.”
Coworker: What a crazy weekend! Me: *takes a knee* CW: What are you doing? M: Protesting this conversation.
Coworker: What a crazy weekend! Me: *takes a knee* CW: What are you doing? M: Protesting this conversation.
Cell phones make it easy to communicate with everybody except the people you’re currently with.
Cell phones make it easy to communicate with everybody except the people you’re currently with.
1% battery….. Because I like to live on the
1% battery….. Because I like to live on the
Hey girl, do you like trucks? Cause I got a semi.
Hey girl, do you like trucks? Cause I got a semi.
A friend asked how I’d describe a hot air balloon, and I just told him it’s a lot like my ex, but with a basket.
A friend asked how I’d describe a hot air balloon, and I just told him it’s a lot like my ex, but with a basket.