Giving my wife a bikini wax for the first time. Should I wake her up or just let it be a surprise?
a rock fell out my pocket and i crouched down to find it and a bunch of people helped like i lost a contact. had to pretend it wasn’t a rock
a rock fell out my pocket and i crouched down to find it and a bunch of people helped like i lost a contact. had to pretend it wasn’t a rock
What’s black, white and red, and can’t turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her head.
What’s black, white and red, and can’t turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her head.
Women on twitter tell me my beard is hot Women in real life tell me where I can find food and shelter .
Women on twitter tell me my beard is hot Women in real life tell me where I can find food and shelter .
Anyone have any sex laying around they’re not using I could borrow?
Anyone have any sex laying around they’re not using I could borrow?
Your mother has terrible taste in children.
Your mother has terrible taste in children.
The pleasure is all mine… The greeting of a greedy hedonist.
The pleasure is all mine… The greeting of a greedy hedonist.
What’s the best part about sleeping with twenty five year olds? There’s twenty of them.
What’s the best part about sleeping with twenty five year olds? There’s twenty of them.
What do you call the grounds of a university that specializes in teaching neuroscience to hippopotamuses? Hippocampus!
What do you call the grounds of a university that specializes in teaching neuroscience to hippopotamuses? Hippocampus!
I am never going to procrastinate again… Starting next semester
I am never going to procrastinate again… Starting next semester