Why does The Little Mermaid wear seashells? Cuz she grew out of her B shell *im so sorry*
*wins oscar I’d like to thank my legs,for always supporting me;my arms,who are always by my side& also my fingers,I can always count on them
*wins oscar I’d like to thank my legs,for always supporting me;my arms,who are always by my side& also my fingers,I can always count on them
What’s the difference between men and government bonds? Bonds mature.
What’s the difference between men and government bonds? Bonds mature.
Nobel Prize Who ever invented Knock, Knock Jokes should win the No-bell Prize.
Nobel Prize Who ever invented Knock, Knock Jokes should win the No-bell Prize.
You shouldn’t kiss someone on January 1st It’s the first date
You shouldn’t kiss someone on January 1st It’s the first date
My wife asked me to stop singing Oasis songs. I said maybe.
My wife asked me to stop singing Oasis songs. I said maybe.
Auto-correct changed my “I’m tired” to “shut the fuck up, you unemployed bitch”.
Auto-correct changed my “I’m tired” to “shut the fuck up, you unemployed bitch”.
Like this if you can’t think of a clever status either…
Like this if you can’t think of a clever status either…
Why was the floppy disk self-conscious? Because it was FAT.
Why was the floppy disk self-conscious? Because it was FAT.
Why did the Marxist drop out of school? He didn’t like the classes.
Why did the Marxist drop out of school? He didn’t like the classes.