I was going to exercise until I remembered the story about that healthy guy that died that one time.
“What’s your favorite kind of music?” Asked one windmill to another. The windmill responds, “I’m a metal fan.”
“What’s your favorite kind of music?” Asked one windmill to another. The windmill responds, “I’m a metal fan.”
My roommate is 3 days younger than me so ive gotten in the habit of saying “when i was your age..” and then describing what i did 3 days ago
My roommate is 3 days younger than me so ive gotten in the habit of saying “when i was your age..” and then describing what i did 3 days ago
want to know why i didnt have sex last night? The roofie didn’t work.
want to know why i didnt have sex last night? The roofie didn’t work.
Why does The Little Mermaid wear seashells? Cuz she grew out of her B shell *im so sorry*
Why does The Little Mermaid wear seashells? Cuz she grew out of her B shell *im so sorry*
*wins oscar I’d like to thank my legs,for always supporting me;my arms,who are always by my side& also my fingers,I can always count on them
*wins oscar I’d like to thank my legs,for always supporting me;my arms,who are always by my side& also my fingers,I can always count on them
What’s the difference between men and government bonds? Bonds mature.
What’s the difference between men and government bonds? Bonds mature.
My buddy is awesome at grilling steaks. They are all very well done
My buddy is awesome at grilling steaks. They are all very well done
Drinking non-alcohol beer is like to eat out your own sister: the same taste but something is wrong
Drinking non-alcohol beer is like to eat out your own sister: the same taste but something is wrong
Once you go black… You’re a single mother.
Once you go black… You’re a single mother.