What is something that is invisible and lying on the floor? [RACISM ALERT!] A black man that has gotten the shit kicked out of him.
How many good deeds do you need to be called a superhero? Because If it’s one or less, I’m totally there.
How many good deeds do you need to be called a superhero? Because If it’s one or less, I’m totally there.
It’s easier to find the needle in the haystack when you bring a flamethrower. That’s a fact, jack. Merica.
It’s easier to find the needle in the haystack when you bring a flamethrower. That’s a fact, jack. Merica.
How are sex and pizza similar? If you get it from someone in a Chuck E. Cheese’s it’s never very good.
How are sex and pizza similar? If you get it from someone in a Chuck E. Cheese’s it’s never very good.
How do murderers turn off the lights? Killowatt
How do murderers turn off the lights? Killowatt
[starts Power Point presentation titled “Why I’m Breaking Up With You”] Him: Wait, what the–? Me: Please hold all questions until the end.
[starts Power Point presentation titled “Why I’m Breaking Up With You”] Him: Wait, what the–? Me: Please hold all questions until the end.
Why does lightning always strike trees? They are the path of leaf resistance.
Why does lightning always strike trees? They are the path of leaf resistance.
I got a tattoo of a gong Because I heard it’s cool to get a tattoo of a Chinese cymbal
I got a tattoo of a gong Because I heard it’s cool to get a tattoo of a Chinese cymbal
How do you call a homosexual with a boner? Homo Erectus
How do you call a homosexual with a boner? Homo Erectus
Dad owl: I’m dying so I need you to look after things. I’m going to give you- Son owl: Don’t say it Dad: Power of a tawny Son: [turns head]
Dad owl: I’m dying so I need you to look after things. I’m going to give you- Son owl: Don’t say it Dad: Power of a tawny Son: [turns head]