Category: Cat jokes

Why do cannibals hate Pentecostals? Because they’re always throwing up their hands.

On The Walking Dead, Glenn said “I will find you.” I guess he’s gonna keep an eye out for her.

What’s the difference between Donald Trump and an oompa loompa? If you are wise, you won’t listen to him.

There isn’t such a thing as a communist school is there… They’re all in classes?

What’s the difference between my broken watch and a lesbian? My watch hasn’t got a strap on.

What does a bowling ball and your mom have in common? You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter, and they’ll always come back.

SPELLING BEE “Defiant” Can I have the definition, please? “No”

What do you do at a festival when the bass is too much? Drop some acid, it’ll neutralize the effect

[Date] Me: how about a drink? get whatever floats your boat Her: thanks! i’ll have a mai tai Me: *glaring* you float a boat with water karen

Wife: Why do you keep talking about my weight behind my back? Husband: Because when I get round to the front I’ve forgotten what I was going to say