Leia: I love you. Han: I know. [gets frozen in carbonite] [two years pass] [gets unfrozen] Leia: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN “I KNOW?!”
Ladies tell me I have the body of a god Buddha
Ladies tell me I have the body of a god Buddha
I wish more religions took advantage of a vow of silence.
I wish more religions took advantage of a vow of silence.
Ugh, I just finished eating at a restuarant, and some patronizing waitress kept asking if I wanted another shaker! It was so insalting!
Ugh, I just finished eating at a restuarant, and some patronizing waitress kept asking if I wanted another shaker! It was so insalting!
Married 24 years now. All I recall about my wedding day is something about death.
Married 24 years now. All I recall about my wedding day is something about death.
Why do people consistently make bad chemistry jokes? Because all the good ones Argon.
Why do people consistently make bad chemistry jokes? Because all the good ones Argon.
Have you ever wanted to make a difference? WELL THEN GO TO A FUCKING MATH CLASS YOU FUCK
Have you ever wanted to make a difference? WELL THEN GO TO A FUCKING MATH CLASS YOU FUCK
At jury duty they said, “You do not have to be fluent in English.” So what you’re supposed to do is just guess if the guy is innocent.
At jury duty they said, “You do not have to be fluent in English.” So what you’re supposed to do is just guess if the guy is innocent.
Genie: You have 3 wishes. I don’t want to run into spiderwebs anymore. That’s it…. I’m done. You can keep the other 2 wishes.
Genie: You have 3 wishes. I don’t want to run into spiderwebs anymore. That’s it…. I’m done. You can keep the other 2 wishes.
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.