Whats big and green and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A pool table.
If you love somebody, let them go. If they’re smart, they’ll keep going.
If you love somebody, let them go. If they’re smart, they’ll keep going.
How many potatoes does it take to kill an irishman? Accounting for the toxins in the skin of an unwashed potato… about 457
How many potatoes does it take to kill an irishman? Accounting for the toxins in the skin of an unwashed potato… about 457
Nothing will get this Billy Joel song out of my head. At this point, I’m praying for a heart attack-ack-ack-ack-ack-ack.
Nothing will get this Billy Joel song out of my head. At this point, I’m praying for a heart attack-ack-ack-ack-ack-ack.
’50 shades of gray’ -worst set of crayola colored pencils.
’50 shades of gray’ -worst set of crayola colored pencils.
My archaeologist friend has invited me to a party to celebrate finding an ancient man’s leg. It should be quite a shin-dig.
My archaeologist friend has invited me to a party to celebrate finding an ancient man’s leg. It should be quite a shin-dig.
My Local Pizza Place Just Folded Now they serve Calzones.
My Local Pizza Place Just Folded Now they serve Calzones.
What’s a cats favorite color? Puuuuurple.
What’s a cats favorite color? Puuuuurple.
Take me to a bar on an empty stomach and see how quickly I can become much more entertaining than the entire cast of Jersey Shore.
Take me to a bar on an empty stomach and see how quickly I can become much more entertaining than the entire cast of Jersey Shore.
There’s only one downside of putting a woman on the $20 bill. That downside is that the $20 bill is now only worth $15.66
There’s only one downside of putting a woman on the $20 bill. That downside is that the $20 bill is now only worth $15.66