I have the heart of a lion.. .. and a lifetime ban from the Toronto zoo.
Make sure you tip your exorcist or else you can get repossessed.
Make sure you tip your exorcist or else you can get repossessed.
Still haven’t mastered the art of gracefully taking off a sweatshirt.
Still haven’t mastered the art of gracefully taking off a sweatshirt.
why can’t you hear michelle pfeiffer in the bathroom? Because the P is silent.
why can’t you hear michelle pfeiffer in the bathroom? Because the P is silent.
All this negativity in the world and I still remain Positive! -Magic Johnson
All this negativity in the world and I still remain Positive! -Magic Johnson
Nowhere is it more evident That the middle finger IS a suitable mode of communication Than when driving to work
Nowhere is it more evident That the middle finger IS a suitable mode of communication Than when driving to work
What do you call a hot day in Canada? A Nova Scorcha!
What do you call a hot day in Canada? A Nova Scorcha!
What’s ISIS’s favorite Country Band? Allahbama
What’s ISIS’s favorite Country Band? Allahbama
How do you torture Hellen Keller? Give her a basketball and tell her to read it.
How do you torture Hellen Keller? Give her a basketball and tell her to read it.
A man stumbles upon a Genie and is granted 3 wishes. Genie: What is your first wish? Joe: I want to be rich. Genie: Granted. What is your second wish? Rich: I want lots of money.
A man stumbles upon a Genie and is granted 3 wishes. Genie: What is your first wish? Joe: I want to be rich. Genie: Granted. What is your second wish? Rich: I want lots of money.