Answering Machines “I’m only here in spirit at the moment, but if you’ll leave your name and number, I will get back to you as soon as I’m here in person.”
“Read ’em and weep” I say as I lay down my hand: a collection of my grandparent’s handwritten love letters from WWII.
“Read ’em and weep” I say as I lay down my hand: a collection of my grandparent’s handwritten love letters from WWII.
Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and McDonald’s? A: A blonde serves more people in a night.
Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and McDonald’s? A: A blonde serves more people in a night.
What do you call a far-ranging debate? A mass-debate.
What do you call a far-ranging debate? A mass-debate.
Romeo: Your cheeks are like petals. Juliet: Really? Romeo: Yes bicycle pedals.
Romeo: Your cheeks are like petals. Juliet: Really? Romeo: Yes bicycle pedals.
Did you know that by today’s standards Marilyn Monroe would be considered dead?
Did you know that by today’s standards Marilyn Monroe would be considered dead?
You can’t declare Massachusetts a state of emergency Because they’re actually a commonwealth.
You can’t declare Massachusetts a state of emergency Because they’re actually a commonwealth.
your dirty mind ” Give it to me” she yelled, “i am so fucking wet, give it to me now” She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella.
your dirty mind ” Give it to me” she yelled, “i am so fucking wet, give it to me now” She could scream all she wanted, I was keeping the umbrella.
Me:Siri, why don’t I have any friends? Siri:*shows me my Google search history* M:Good call.
Me:Siri, why don’t I have any friends? Siri:*shows me my Google search history* M:Good call.
Whats the difference between acne and a Priest? Acne doesn’t cum on a boys face until he is 13.
Whats the difference between acne and a Priest? Acne doesn’t cum on a boys face until he is 13.