cop: “you’re drunk, get out of the car.” judas: “bbut I’ve bbeen on tthe water all night.” – [jesus whistles innocently]
Look, if you didn’t want to go to prison you should’ve started a war or destroyed the economy. But you downloaded a movie, you felon
Look, if you didn’t want to go to prison you should’ve started a war or destroyed the economy. But you downloaded a movie, you felon
I was playing guitar then my 2 year old took my guitar pick and dropped it somewhere. “Where is my pick,” I said. He replied “Oink Oink! ” I repeated the question but got the same answer every time.
I was playing guitar then my 2 year old took my guitar pick and dropped it somewhere. “Where is my pick,” I said. He replied “Oink Oink! ” I repeated the question but got the same answer every time.
Las Vegas Floor Show What is the difference between a circus side show and a Las Vegas floor show? One has a cunning array of stunts the other has a stunning array of cunts.
Las Vegas Floor Show What is the difference between a circus side show and a Las Vegas floor show? One has a cunning array of stunts the other has a stunning array of cunts.
Please pray for my friends’ 4-year-old. They found out today 7 minutes of his life wasn’t photographed or videotaped and put on Facebook.
Please pray for my friends’ 4-year-old. They found out today 7 minutes of his life wasn’t photographed or videotaped and put on Facebook.
Remember kids, dark humour is like food… Not everybody gets it.
Remember kids, dark humour is like food… Not everybody gets it.
Someone told me not be a dick about Caitlyn Jenner I said “Should I be a twat instead?”
Someone told me not be a dick about Caitlyn Jenner I said “Should I be a twat instead?”
If Biff’s gang had smoked E-cigarettes in ‘Back to the Future 2,’ it would’ve seemed like the least realistic thing in the movie.
If Biff’s gang had smoked E-cigarettes in ‘Back to the Future 2,’ it would’ve seemed like the least realistic thing in the movie.
My kids in public are direct payback for every time I shriek’d PLEASE DON’T HIT ME AGAIN at my mom in the middle of a crowded mall as a kid.
My kids in public are direct payback for every time I shriek’d PLEASE DON’T HIT ME AGAIN at my mom in the middle of a crowded mall as a kid.
Do you know two places to put water? Well Dam
Do you know two places to put water? Well Dam