Me: Santa, why are women so scary? Santa: dude come on, I make $8.50 an hour, get off me.
The scariest moment in any man’s life is when his wife stops talking and it’s his turn to say something in a conversation he’s been ignoring
The scariest moment in any man’s life is when his wife stops talking and it’s his turn to say something in a conversation he’s been ignoring
Why does a Belgian take a stone and a flashlight to bed? The stone to throw the lights out, the flashlight to check if the lights are really out
Why does a Belgian take a stone and a flashlight to bed? The stone to throw the lights out, the flashlight to check if the lights are really out
My boyfriend is being so nice to me since I showed him how easy it was to remove blood from carpeting…
My boyfriend is being so nice to me since I showed him how easy it was to remove blood from carpeting…
My wife asked for the broom… And I said, “Why? Are you going somewhere?”
My wife asked for the broom… And I said, “Why? Are you going somewhere?”
What’s a math teacher’s favorite TV show? Sinefeld
What’s a math teacher’s favorite TV show? Sinefeld
Why was the computer programmer single? Because he couldn’t commit.
Why was the computer programmer single? Because he couldn’t commit.
My noisy upstairs neighbour reminds me of that person I killed next week.
My noisy upstairs neighbour reminds me of that person I killed next week.
I tried suing Amtrak for misplacing my luggage. I lost my case.
I tried suing Amtrak for misplacing my luggage. I lost my case.
How are a pair of skinny jeans like a cheap motel? No ballroom
How are a pair of skinny jeans like a cheap motel? No ballroom