Apparently dogs can die if they eat a lot of chocolate. I wish I had a delicious way to kill myself.
Girls adore it when you guess their weight as they walk by.
Girls adore it when you guess their weight as they walk by.
What is an astronaut’s favorite key on a computer keyboard? The space bar.
What is an astronaut’s favorite key on a computer keyboard? The space bar.
Next time the cashier asks me if I want “Paper or Plastic” I’m just gonna say, “Doesn’t matter to me, I’m bi-sacksual.”
Next time the cashier asks me if I want “Paper or Plastic” I’m just gonna say, “Doesn’t matter to me, I’m bi-sacksual.”
Why did the console gamer faint when they visited the art gallery There were too many frames
Why did the console gamer faint when they visited the art gallery There were too many frames
I thought of making a joke on Apple But I can’t afford it.
I thought of making a joke on Apple But I can’t afford it.
They say there is safety in numbers. Tell that to 6 million jews.
They say there is safety in numbers. Tell that to 6 million jews.
You want just one cow for those magic beans? Idk, I’m suspicious, magic beans sounds like the sort of thing that would cost 2 cows.
You want just one cow for those magic beans? Idk, I’m suspicious, magic beans sounds like the sort of thing that would cost 2 cows.
What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom? One snatches watches…
What’s the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping Tom? One snatches watches…
FRIEND: Just let her down easy ME: Ok [later] ME: *jumping in bouncy castle* I WANT A DIVORCE, KAREN
FRIEND: Just let her down easy ME: Ok [later] ME: *jumping in bouncy castle* I WANT A DIVORCE, KAREN