Two flies are arguing on a toilet seat when… One gets pissed off! (sorry!)
If U are nervous about public speaking, no need to picture the audience naked, just realize they will be on their phone ignoring you anyway.
If U are nervous about public speaking, no need to picture the audience naked, just realize they will be on their phone ignoring you anyway.
You are Darth Vader. How can you tell if your stormtroopers just played paintball in their freetime again? You can’t.
You are Darth Vader. How can you tell if your stormtroopers just played paintball in their freetime again? You can’t.
What’s the difference between an outlaw, and an inlaw? Outlaws are wanted.
What’s the difference between an outlaw, and an inlaw? Outlaws are wanted.
You’ll catch more flies with honey than you will with vinegar. Also a rotting corpse will work. Or poop. Lots of ways to attract flies.
You’ll catch more flies with honey than you will with vinegar. Also a rotting corpse will work. Or poop. Lots of ways to attract flies.
Reason for ER visit: Injured in a masturbatory frenzy Again.
Reason for ER visit: Injured in a masturbatory frenzy Again.
If at first you dont succeed, then skydiving probably isn’t for you!
If at first you dont succeed, then skydiving probably isn’t for you!
Suggested movie theater prices: Adults – $9.00, Under 12 – $ 6.00, Under 3 – $249.00
Suggested movie theater prices: Adults – $9.00, Under 12 – $ 6.00, Under 3 – $249.00
We were on Family Feud once…. Yea, we fought the entire time.
We were on Family Feud once…. Yea, we fought the entire time.
I was in Australia once and I saw someone play Stairway to Heaven on the didgeridoo. I said “That’s Aboriginal.”
I was in Australia once and I saw someone play Stairway to Heaven on the didgeridoo. I said “That’s Aboriginal.”