Just Spent 3 hours in the Emergency room…… …. the Dyson Ball vacuum has a VERY misleading name……..
Did you hear that Napoleon broke the Sphinx’s nose with a singe shot? It was a one-hit wonder. I’ll show myself out.
Did you hear that Napoleon broke the Sphinx’s nose with a singe shot? It was a one-hit wonder. I’ll show myself out.
Why did the Chili Pepper cross the road? To get to the Otherside!
Why did the Chili Pepper cross the road? To get to the Otherside!
If you guys don’t start appreciating my tweets, I will introduce my mom to Twitter. Don’t make me ruin this for everyone.
If you guys don’t start appreciating my tweets, I will introduce my mom to Twitter. Don’t make me ruin this for everyone.
Sit down and let me tell you a story. Once Upon A Time……last night……I had a few drinks and……borrowed your credit card.
Sit down and let me tell you a story. Once Upon A Time……last night……I had a few drinks and……borrowed your credit card.
What’s the Difference between a cactus, and a BMW? A cactus has the prick on the outside.
What’s the Difference between a cactus, and a BMW? A cactus has the prick on the outside.
What’s harder to pull out of than Iraq? Bristol Palin.
What’s harder to pull out of than Iraq? Bristol Palin.
my wife is so ungrateful for christmas I got her an electric chair and she won’t even sit in it.
my wife is so ungrateful for christmas I got her an electric chair and she won’t even sit in it.
Don’t try to understand women. Women understand women and they hate each other.
Don’t try to understand women. Women understand women and they hate each other.
Just seen a woman in town with lipgloss so sticky she had 16 flies attached to her mouth.
Just seen a woman in town with lipgloss so sticky she had 16 flies attached to her mouth.