I’d like to thank my exs for encouraging me to learn about cars. Like how to cut the break lines, hoses, or discreetly slash a tire.
Chris Hansen loses his job and has to get a new job as a cashier at Walmart “Why don’t you take a receipt?”
Chris Hansen loses his job and has to get a new job as a cashier at Walmart “Why don’t you take a receipt?”
Why is it everything I love is either unhealthy, addicting or has multiple restraining orders against me?
Why is it everything I love is either unhealthy, addicting or has multiple restraining orders against me?
I went into a cafe and said, ” A crocodile sandwich and make it snappy.”
I went into a cafe and said, ” A crocodile sandwich and make it snappy.”
Coolest jobs: 1)Beer maker 2)Secretary of War 3)Ninja 4)Guy who pushes scared skydivers
Coolest jobs: 1)Beer maker 2)Secretary of War 3)Ninja 4)Guy who pushes scared skydivers
Jurassic World was fantastic movie… In fact you could say, they “spared no expense”
Jurassic World was fantastic movie… In fact you could say, they “spared no expense”
I had developed a porn addiction, but now I come here instead. These jokes really turn me off!
I had developed a porn addiction, but now I come here instead. These jokes really turn me off!
You don’t have to tell me I’m negative. I no.
You don’t have to tell me I’m negative. I no.
I used to think I could control ducks with my mind but it turns out ducks & I just have very similar ideas about what stuff ducks should do
I used to think I could control ducks with my mind but it turns out ducks & I just have very similar ideas about what stuff ducks should do
I will never go bungee jumping. A rubber breaking was the reason I was born, it sure as hell isn’t going to be the reason that I die.
I will never go bungee jumping. A rubber breaking was the reason I was born, it sure as hell isn’t going to be the reason that I die.