A guy told me I’m bad at flirting and I got so mad I took back all the dead birds I nailed to his door.
Ever hear about the Mexican Train Killer? I heard he had locomotives.
Ever hear about the Mexican Train Killer? I heard he had locomotives.
Tell the guy at the first drive-thru window that you want the guy at the second window to throw your food into the car without you stopping.
Tell the guy at the first drive-thru window that you want the guy at the second window to throw your food into the car without you stopping.
Who always wins the insect election? The lesser of two weevils.
Who always wins the insect election? The lesser of two weevils.
And on the 8th day, He said “Oh I’ll make carbs delicious AND fattening LOL!”
And on the 8th day, He said “Oh I’ll make carbs delicious AND fattening LOL!”
What has 100 legs but can’t walk? 50 pairs of pants.
What has 100 legs but can’t walk? 50 pairs of pants.
What do you do if a bird shits on your car? Don’t ask her out again.
What do you do if a bird shits on your car? Don’t ask her out again.
2 guys walk into a bar The 3rd guy ducks
2 guys walk into a bar The 3rd guy ducks
60% of all secretaries can type… The other 40% are huntn’ peckers.
60% of all secretaries can type… The other 40% are huntn’ peckers.
I wish I hadn’t spoken French to my cat. Now he thinks he’s the king of Iran.
I wish I hadn’t spoken French to my cat. Now he thinks he’s the king of Iran.